A sample from my new writing class...

I have started taking a weekly writing class with City of Toronto every Tuesday.

Last week's assignment was to write about "any event" that takes place in your childhood bedroom, so... run-on sentences and whatnot aside, what do you think?

Monday Advertising Inspiration

Working on freelance projects as a sole stream of revenue is hard work (impossible?) at best. I am probably charging way too little for my services to start, and also putting in about one-third of the required sales and networking effort required to secure new clients.... SIGH. It's Monday, I'm sure you're depressed enough already, so here are some great ads from the recent issue of WIRED to give you a little creative boost to start the week of right!!

FIRST OFF... what the actual hell guys, the future is here and we didn't even know it. Apparently it is now possible to manipulate 3D holograms in real time using collaborative software from this company called bluebeam? All I can think is that this technology must be pretty shitty, otherwise wouldn't the fact that building the holodeck is just a few years away not be front page news!?!?! woahhhhh

Ray ban has a pretty badass multi-page ad. Wear Ray Bans: Cowboys and Rockstars do. BRANDING at its FINEST.

And this threw me for a loop: cigarette ads in a magazine subscription to a Canadian address without all kinds of crazy cancer messages!? But other than the fact that due to cost they decided to skip the third panel in this multi-paged ad (What happened to Original?), I like the esthetics of this a lot and the fact that I think the second picture is also used in a billboard campaign in Spain for pre-teen social network Tuenti which is funny... "Taste it all" does seem like a weird tagline though for cigarettes, now that it is pretty much public knowledge that "tasting it all" would imply enjoying the flavors of tar, cyanide, and rat poison....

 Go motorola! Tapping into the on-shore manufacturing craze, our obsessive need to customize everything AND accessorize your already accessorized device with hipster-esque background objects. FTW. All you need is some tiny infographic about 3D printing, and a little pic of the models-as-hipsters/engineers (because our company is so trendy) that we can all look up to for inspiration. DESIGNED, BY, YOU, MADE IN AMERICA

 Okay, I'll admit, the miles and miles thing is pretty dumb, but I love the colors, and this car looks cute and ready for adventures, just like my own 'Lil Red!! Good job, Toyota USA print agency, whoever you are...

Thank god for Netflix Vampires...

First of all, if you don't know me, then you need to know this: I have an unshakeable, pre-twilight love for vampire stories... Having thought about why I love them so much, I can only possibly trace it back to a childhood obsession with Beauty and the Beast, but I digress.

My latest obsession (I'm a bit behind...) has been Netflix videos, and I am a passionate supporter of torrents, so this is a big step for me, but there is something exciting about having instant access to thousands of movies just a click away... Being in Canada, there are some limitations (aka: pretty limited selection of shit movies), but I just consider that an added challenge!!

Check out these gems I've found in the past few weeks:

Hemlock Grove (TV show)
This is a Netflix original series with some seriously slow first few episodes, but it's worth the lead-up to the season finale!!




8 Reasons to watch:
1) Alexander Skarsgard (Eric from True Blood!)'s little brother stars... and noticing little gestures and speech patterns similar between them is an added bonus activity! Sadly, he's nowhere near as sexy, but does a REAL good "creepy".
2) The prince from Ever After grew up, and is also a lot less charming, but he's here too!
3) Jean Gray/Pheonix from X-Men is very mysterious and has awesome outfits.
4) It's all filmed in Canada! and another fun activity is noticing all the Canadian stuff (ie: cigarettes covered in the convenience stores, roadsigns, etc)
5) The main guy is also Canadian and a hotttiiieeeee
6) It is probably what Vampire Diaries was aiming for but miserably failed to acheive due to it's PG rating and poor, poor acting abilities of all the main characters. No such fail here. :)
7) Spoiler: the werewolf transformation is SO COOL...
8) It leaves about as many opened mysteries and curiosities as the first season of Lost

 Midnight Son (2011): I am always skeptical on Netflix watching these independent horror-esque films, but this one got some stupid high rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and it's actually one of the most original vampire movies I have ever seen... I wish the main actor was a bit better looking, and the storyline was a little less rambling, but overall, a surprisingly good watch!

...and I am quite looking forward to these three:

Sci-Fi movies you should see (because chances are, you probably haven't)

Inspired by FanExpo in Toronto this past weekend (I couldn't go!!!) and my solo trip to the IMAX theatre this afternoon to see Elysium (which is totally awesome), I thought I would compile a list of other sci-fi-esque movies that I totally love in case anyone is looking for ways to spend their evenings on Netflix. Don't let your aversion for "sci-fi" turn you off, you'll only find the rare alien on this list.

1. District 9 (2009): Released on the heels of one of the coolest mysterious-teaser marketing campaigns to accompany a movie in the last 10 years (check it out HERE), I will admit that I went to see it not knowing anything at all about what I was getting into--and now it's probably my #1 favorite movie. Set in South Africa (cool!), it's actually a faux documentary about the occupation of Johannesburg by a camp of refugee aliens that's narrated by a quirky non-hero with the ridiculous name of Wikus Van De Merwe. Something usual happens to him and the film also follows his downward spiral... oh, and it's also an allegory for apartheid!! TRUST ME, watch it if you haven't. (and then tell me what you think!)

2. The Island (2005): DON'T CLICK THAT LINK (spoiler alert!) Okay, to be fair part of the reason I like this so much is watching Ewan McGregor act with childlike innocence.... but the concept is cool, and it's fairly well executed (okay, so you can probably see the "twist" coming from miles away, but it's still great when it happens). I feel as if a lot of people I know missed this in the theatres (I did!), but I have been hosting screenings for virgin viewers at my house regularly in the years since. It's pretty Hollywood glam, and there's not much depth to it, but I like it all the same.

3. Minority Report (2002): Yeah, it's Tom Cruise, but again, another pretty interesting concept that is executed with a pleasant blend of the expected Hollywood sci-fi action glamour with enough humanity to make it memorable. I showed a bunch of clips in MIT projects in university... but I specifically like the smaller elements of the future "world" in this movie: when he's walking by stores and the billboards greet him by name via retinal scan, and his family video "holograms". Cool shit.

4. Equilibrium (2002): Christian Bale pre-Batman. Set in the future, we see mankind's answer to world peace as the elimination of emotions via a mandatory-under-law daily injection of drugs. No passion, no love, no art, no creativity... I love the societal repercussions suggested here from humans having no emotions: the removal of literally everything that evokes any kind of emotional response.  Watch it if you missed this one.

5. Repo Men (2010): I actually have only seen this movie once, but something about it stuck with me, and the leadup to the climax of the storyline takes you on one hell of a ride. I guess the thread you'll see with all of these movies is a strong human element, despite all the crazy movie tricks and FX. Jude Law serves that up pretty well here.

6. Vanilla Sky (2001): Say what you want, this is still a great idea for a sci-fi flick. Basically, Tom Cruise gets in a car accident and then the movie traces his downward spiral of a life... but things get increasingly confusing. I actually don't even like the original Spanish language version better. Try to figure it out as you go, and don't read spoilers! It's part of the fun...

7. Knowing (2009): Again, this one was critically a disaster, but there's something about it I like. It legitimately scared me (so, not for the faint of heart), but I really like how the story unfolds, too. It's so nice to have a child actor in a movie that's not annoying, and the ticking clock of the end of the world framing the rest of the plot revelations helps to build intensity--I am not even disappointed by the ending, better than the world just exploding, right?

8. Moon (2009): This movie gets in your head, and part of that is probably due to the fabulous creepiness of Sam Rockwell putting forward an amazing performance. To sum it up, a guy is up in space alone with only a computer voiced by Kevin Spacey for company.... things don't go well. Another one that starts out calm, and takes a turn for the worse ending in a twist you probably won't have seen coming (Don't look it up! It'll blow your mind!!!!).

9. Battle Royale (2000): First, if you're not one for foreign films, trust me you will get over that in the first 5 minutes of watching this Japanese gore-fest. This movie is what the Hunger Games SHOULD have been, and it follows a very similar concept... only it was made more than 10 years before Katniss's family-friendly adventure. In an over-populated future Earth, a school class is randomly selected to be sent on a one-way field trip to an island on which they have to battle each other to the death--last one standing gets to leave the island, and if there's two? Well, you both die! I love the mix of over-the-top anime-inspired characters and violence, and how this movie also fairly realistically takes you through what would happen if the average person was faced with this scenario... something Hunger Games doesn't really cover well.

10. I am tempted to put The Fifth Element on this list, but if you haven't seen THAT, then get right out of town. So, for this last one, I will give a list of some other sci-fi flicks I have watched a bunch of times, that either are more well-known or I don't like quite as much, but are still pretty great (also, I'm tired and going to bed): Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, TRON, Titan A.E., The Matrix..

Oooh! I thought of one more! It's on Netflix right now, I just watched it last week. VERY cool, kind of Contagion-esque, but more surreal. Perfect Sense (2011): my sister originally recommended it to me and I totally forgot about it until it popped up on my suggested films--thanks Netflix! It's about a mysterious disease that pops up in the future causing people to break down into a fit of complete sadness followed by the loss of their sense of smell... and then, you know, the usual downward spiral... :)

Also, here's two more lists I found while grabbing these links that include these, plus lots more great films if you're bored:
http://www.imdb.com/list/Ui0vVgSMM6Y/?ref_=tt_rls_1
http://www.imdb.com/list/E1fozfxyin0/

Books I know you will love too... Maybe

So, despite the fact that Googling my full name will result in numerous Amazon wishlists and listmania collections of teen vampire romance novels (please don't go do that now just to prove that you can.. I wish the internet would allow me to remove those from public domain, but alas, I have yet been able to figure out how!!!) Anyway, I thought I would make a list here of books I have read recently OR that I still think are a pretty solid use of time.

If you know me (which I hope you do if you're here-- internet stalkers stranger danger?) then you will also know that this is going to be a pretty eclectic list. But know that I don't like reading books that challenge me (I read for funsies!) and I like books particularly that weave stories that stay with you as interesting, or characters that you really get to know and love. Normally, description-heavy, complex plotlines would not fare well by me. I also like writers with a conversational tone.

Also, if you haven't discovered this already, Audio Books are the best way of surviving rush hour traffic. Or Commuting. Try it, if you don't believe me--it will change your life!!!

1. Bitten - Kelley Armstrong (have to rep. a great Canadian author, so it's werewolves... get over it! it's great! the audiobook is read by a lady with a pretty annoying voice, but after about the 1st chapter, you get over it).

2.  The Dark Tower Series - Stephen King (This one I didn't listen to, but I probably wouldn't recommend doing that anyway, based on how the story unfolds. AND, the first book is pretty boring, but it will pique your interest enough that I hope you keep reading, because by the 3rd book, this series is AWESOME.)

3. Hold me Closer Necromancer - Lish McBride (Stupid title, right? Well, I had extremely low expectations as well, but was pleasantly surprised by the wit and style of the writing. The audiobook is good too. Also, the sequel is called Necromancing the Stone--which is a movie I secretly LOVE )

4. The Strain -- Guillermo Del Toro (excellent audiobook read by Ron Pearlman. Author's name ring a bell? Pan's Labyrinth director. Very, very creepy. Be prepared to have it haunt you, but in a way that it leaves you so impressed that a book could do such a thing.)

5. Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir -- Jenny Lawson (lent to me by the great Lisa Caverley, I laughed my way through this entire book. Dark, dark humor will appreciate. Tremendously...)

6. Halfway to the Grave -- Jeaniene Frost (IF you like to indulge in a little cheese romance every once in a while AND you are a diehard fan of the Buffy and Spike romance storyline, then, and only then, will you probably like these books. BUT, that said, if the above does apply to you, then be satisfied in knowing that these are pretty well-written for cheese romance, and the story is fun in a badass way that makes Spike not out to be a pathetic loser, oh, whoops, I mean Bones. How this lady doesn't get sued is beyond me.)

7. Swoon - Nina Malkin (you can still get this book for $4 at Chapters clearance, and I appreciated the clever twists of the plot, and the interesting way the author approached a pretty overdone Twilight-esque story arc. I think the style is nice too, and it reads a lot better than most of the inane trash in Teen literature lately.)

8. Life As We Knew it - Susan Beth Pfeffer (THIS book gets in your head. It reads like how a real person would actually keep a diary/journal, and that's what makes it so eerie. You literally put it down and keep thinking that what's in the book is actually happen. #apocalypseliterature )

That's all for now. No wonder I don't blog that often--it's so time-consuming! Well, happy reading, folks! If any of you actually reads one of these books, or has any other recommendations, let me know!!

Daily Writing: a fragment of a horror story

Okay, so, inspired by my students who are writing scary stories at the moment to submit to a Halloween essay contest, I thought I'd write something a bit scary/creepy today just for fun because our internet was down and I just finished my also semi-creepy book.... 

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The Path

The pathway had always been there in Hayley's backyard. A dark place that she never went anywhere near when she was playing outside, and always seemed to become the subject of the ghost stories they'd tell at sleepovers when she was younger. When she asked her parents about it, they had always just brushed it off, as if they had gone down it a million times and even the idea of being worried or afraid was ridiculous. Yet from where Hayley sat in her kitchen, staring through the window, and across the yard at its entrance, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was just not right, and never had been.

So, why, after 17 years of always being careful to avoid it, she let her friends dare her into exploring it that night, she couldn't explain. As she stared out the window, the two creepy branches that always overhung its entrance from the mess of forest above shook in the wind and seemed to wave at her, menacingly, beckoning her into their clutches. But the reason she'd allowed herself to be talked into it was that it was Halloween, and due to the renovations being done on her friend Brandon's house this year, his annual party was not happening—so everybody needed another source of treat and trickery for the night. 

It had actually been Brandon, her longest friend, who was more than familiar with her backyard and all of its... features, that suggested the alternative plan. “Hayley's Haunted Walk” he called it, and invited everyone to a facebook event from his iPhone quicker than she could protest. Of course, after the event was posted, cancelling would make her seem like a party-pooper, so it was on. He'd even made an event description that pretty aptly described the creepy path, and joking about Hayley wandering to her DOOOOOOMMMMmmmmm. She had to admit, all the hype he wrote did make it sound spooky, and obviously, no one had anything else going on that night, since everyone had reserved it for Brandon's party that didn't happen, so the RSVP list was already at almost 50 people—most of their graduating class. She couldn't back out now. But the branches continued to claw at the air, and she couldn't help a momentary vision of her hair becoming tangled in them and Brandon's story coming to pass in a few short hours. 

Hayley looked around the kitchen taking stock of all the party supplies she'd bought. She had never hosted a party before, mainly because her house wasn't really that big, and her two much younger brothers meant their house was still pretty kid-focused, and thus, not ready to host a bunch of teenagers late at night. Plus, Brandon's house had pool tables, sound systems, the works, and since all of their friends were mutual, she'd never really had the need. What Brandon's house did not have, however, was a haunted, forbidden place in the backyard. She looked outside again, and watch a squirrel prance across the yard. She watched also as it came close to the path, and then bounded in a distinct circle to avoid it before darting off into the forest beyond. Even the animals avoided it. No amount of human superstition or silliness could explain even the squirrel's avoidance.

So, after her brothers and her parents left to go trick-or-treating, Hayley sat for the next 2 hours waiting for her guests to arrive, psyching herself up for going down the path that evening. Brandon was the first to arrive, of course, because she'd told him to come half hour early to make sure she had everything ready. She opened the front door to greet him. “Hayyyyley... I Vant to Suck your Blauddd!” he announced, sheilding his face with a red-lined cape just like Dracula did in the movies. He dropped the cape, “Or should I go for more of an Edward vibe? 'Ohhh.... Bellaaaaa' “ and with that he pretended to swoon against the porch. “More likely to get the ladies excited, eh?” he joked, raising his eyebrows in her direction. 

“Oh stop,” Hayley chided as she let him inside, “No amount of blood sucking is going to trick girls into falling for you, trust me.” She laughed, “besides, I need you to be totally focussed on coming to my rescue after I get attacked by the Creature from Lake Woodlands when I invade his path later. The ladies will have to wait for the Christmas party, maybe you can try the mistletoe again. Remember when...” she trailed off. All joking aside, she really hoped Brandon would rescue her, and thinking of her impending mission, she suddenly didn't really feel like teasing anymore. Plus, now that they had reached the kitchen, she could see the path again, outside. Waiting.

“What? Come on, pussycat, the girls were talking about that for months afterwards. I'll be a hit! As long as someone doesn't show up dressed as a werewolf and tries to out-do me with his six-pack, because then I'm screwed.” He lifted up his shirt to reveal his always on-the-skinny-side pale stomach, and prodded her with his elbow after she didn't look or even respond. She was transfixed on the path. Brandon saw her blank eyes staring right through him out the window, maybe he shouldn't have pushed her to do this after all. 

 

“Mreow?” he tried joking again, playing up her cat costume, “Look, if you don't want to do this, Hayley, just say so. It's just a joke, for Halloween, come on... people love haunted houses and monster legends and all that crap. Did you see that event description I wrote? Pure gold! 'Creature from Lake Woodlands'??? Hahaha... I even heard Meredith telling some kid she saw it when she was out rowing the other day. People are freaked. This is going to be awesome Hayley.” But still, she stared past him. 

 

“Look,” he grabbed her by the shoulders, “Snap out of it. This isn't like you. People are going to start arriving soon, and then the rest of the night will be a blast. Trust me, don't worry. Everything will be fine.”

But she wasn't so sure. Hayley couldn't help noticing the ring of dead grass around the path's entrance, and the twisting, thorny vines that seemed to overtake all the other plants near the path, and writhe like snakes when she wasn't looking directly at them, and the same waving branches, which now, in the dimming light, looked more like bony fingers than ever before. She shuddered and snapped out of the trance. “Yeah, it'll be fine,” she met his gaze, “It's fine. I'm fine. Let's put these coolers outside,” and she shook her head, and grabbed a handle. 

The guests slowly trickled in, and about an hour later, smuggled booze from people's parent's liquor cabinets, pop, punch, cupcakes, chips and candy flowing, people were ready for Hayley to brave the path. She stepped outside, and someone took her Coke out of the hand as she crossed the lawn to chants of “Hayley! Hayley! Hayley!” surrounded her. She felt like she was in a daze, and she felt like grabbing the hands that tapped her shoulders for encouragement as she passed like lifelines, and screaming for help. But all she could do was walk closer and closer to the path. Someone had thought to bring spotlights for outside—probably Brandon—she thought, as a momentary distraction from her fate, but the eerie shadows cast by the super bright bulbs just made her target seem more ominous because the light appeared to vanish as it crept over the edges of the path's entrance, so that all that lay beyond it was unknown darkness. 

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So I can't really seem to give anything an ending.... kind of a problem. well, they dont really have beginnings either, yet. just like fragments... interesting.

Daily Reader Writer #2: Inside

Okay, so today's entry was a Shakespearean love poem assignment where you were meant to describe your love in naturalistic terms (ie: without using similes and metaphors usually reserved for love poems) based on Shakespeare's "My Mistress' Eyes are Nothing Like The Sun". However, I am going to choose to bypass that assignment, and instead, write from July 3rd.

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ARE WE ALONE? PHILOSOPHICAL IMPLICATIONS OF THE DISCOVERY OF EXTRATERRESTRIAL LIFE by Paul Davies

Try This: Contact with extraterrestrials has been a popular theme in science fiction since H G Wells. Write your own alien-contact story but avoid movie cliches of reptilian monsters, malicious invaders, or cuddlesome ETs.

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Inside

"Because I told you not to open it, Sierra! I told you we should have called the police, or the FBI or the CIA or whoever deals with these kinds of things! You cannot blame this on me, or anyone but yourself!" Ryan lectured her again, before stalking into the kitchen in a frustrated rage.

Sierra thought back to the previous night. Had she really made such a poor judgement call? Her mother always said that her curiosity would get the best of her one day, and she certainly couldn't say that her motivation for opening the strange device had been motivated by anything but. Certainly not heroism or any other likely reason I person would take matters into their own hands after discovering an ancient capsule covered in strange glyphs at the bottom of a well in their backyard. She knew it was wrong, but she also knew that as soon as they called authorities, the thing would be whisked away to some secret laboratory never to be seen or heard from again, and she couldn't have lived the rest of her life just not knowing. But now look where it had got her.

 [ But now you know... ]

 The voice came again. Strange, yet familiar, and not exactly in her head, but not exactly outside of it either, like it was echoing nearby. She hadn't exactly told Ryan about the voice yet, but who would blame her? He was never really good at dealing with things like this anyway. Not the man you'd want to have around in a crisis, so to speak. He tended to overreact--not that this situation was in any way okay.

She glanced at her fingers, as if hoping it would all have been a dream and they would be back to normal. But instead, of course, she saw the same strange scaly blue pattern, and it was already a bit deeper in hue than it had been this morning, and she swore it was closer to her knuckle that it had been, too. She checked to see that Ryan had, in fact, stormed off, and she could now hear him stomping around upstairs, so she was sure he wouldn't be stepping into the room to finish his rant. She reached down with her strange fingertips and pulled back the edge of her tanktop. Sure enough, the blue patch on her stomach was also darker, and the scale pattern more prominent. It had also increased in size by at least 2 inches around.

The strange rash had appeared late last night in all the places where the pod had touched her bare skin. Ryan had almost convinced her to give up, that it was simply an object, not a container as she suspected, when she finally managed to pry it open by bracing it against her midriff, and pulling hard at the diamond-shaped crust at the front of the pod. But that is the exact moment that they both blacked out, and when they woke up, collapsed together on the floor of the barn as few hours later, the object was gone.

[ But to where...? ]

The voice again, encouraging her curiosity.

"Stop it!!" she yelled at the bodiless presence. But then she clamped her hands over her mouth as Ryan walked into the room.

"Stop what?" he asked, a puzzled look on his face.

"Nothing. Nothing," Sierra replied, reaching to straighten the coasters on the edge of the coffee table.

There was a small pause, as if Ryan was presenting her with the opportunity to confess, but instead, he was the one to come forward, "Sierra, I have to tell you something, and I'm sorry for getting so upset, but I can't... deal with this. Look." he pulled up his sleeve to reveal five perfect spots of light blue on his forearm.

"Right where I touched you last night to wake you up in the barn."

"Yeah, and look what else," He turned around and slid his shirt off over his head. His entire back was covered with streaks of blue, very faint, but definitely there. "That's from last night too, you were restless in your sleep, and you kept reaching out for me. I would have woken you, but you always calmed down once I turned over, I didn't think anything of it."

Sierra said nothing. She felt for the edge of the sofa without looking away from Ryan, and slowly lowered herself to the seat. She had to tell him about the voice. Whatever this was, whatever she had done to herself, it was spreading. Contagious. Alien. Bad enough that she had infected herself, but now Ryan as well? She had to tell him. They had to figure this out, before it got worse.

"There's a voice." She stated.

Ryan paused, pulling his shirt back down and coming around to take a seat on the armchair opposite her. She looked up at him, met his eyes and gauged his body language. He was on edge. Well, better now than later, she figured. "Not all the time, but sometimes. In my head. Like it's speaking to me, but, I've never heard it before last night."

He didn't give the reaction she'd been expecting, but now she looked closer at his eyes and they seemed sort of glazed over. Denial. "What do they say?" he asked.

"Nothing, really. Just like, comments, on what's going on. It's only happened a few times. All I know is that the voice seems.... foreign. I guess I can't explain it. Just that, it's like it's someone talking to me, only there's no one there, and it's like they're far away."

[ Not as far as you think. ]

"There! Oh my god, did you hear it?"

"Hear what? The voice? What did it say?"

"It said, 'Not as far as you think.' "

"What like, not as far as you think it's far away?" he proposed, "Oh fuck. Sierra. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck," he was on his feet now, pacing back and forth in quick little steps and running his hands through his hair.

[ Already here. In you. Just wait. Tomorrow. ]

Then Sierra screamed.

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Love District 9, maybe this was a bit of a rip-off, but I think that's what I liked about it. It challenged what you'd think of as a "typical alien movie", and I think it brought up interesting ideas about how the introduction of aliens to our world cause human beings to change the way they see themselves, and especially in this situation, what does it really mean to be other?  Can you become other? and what is it like to make that transition? What goes through someone's mind as their perception of what is other is slowly merged with their perceived notion of self (or terrestrial, in this case)? I suppose in that way, this is very body-snatchers-esque as well, but I just find that concept fascinating, so... yeah! Day 2 complete!